I think I’ve been pranked

So I don’t usually talk about my job on here, but this was too good to pass up. I work as a librarian and I answer questions over chat. This was one I got today. Names have been changed to protect the innocent.

Patron:10:40:13 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400) Chat Transcript: HELLO LIBRARY. I AM WRITING TO YOU THAT MY BROTHER STOLE MY COOKIES!!!!
Librarian 1:
10:40:13 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
Note: Patron’s screen name: WALTER
Librarian 1:
10:40:50 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
I’m sorry to hear that Walter. Brothers are like that sometimes.
10:41:16 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
cna u help mee?
Librarian 1:
10:42:03 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
There’s not much I can do for you on that one. Have you tried asking him nicely to return them?
10:42:35 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
Librarian 1:
10:42:57 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
Is he your younger or older brother?
10:43:24 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
yonger. he is thre and i am seven.
Librarian 1:
10:43:45 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
3 huh? It’s hard to reason with a three year old. You might need to ask mom or dad for help.
10:44:37 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
Oh my goodness! I am sorry that my little Walter is writing to you with his own problems that do not even interfere with the library. This is Walter’s mother.
Librarian 1:
10:45:25 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
Oh that’s okay.
Librarian 1:
10:45:30 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
He’s very funny.
10:45:50 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
Really? What did he do?
Librarian 1:
10:46:10 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
Just that the thing he wrote about his brother not giving back his cookies.
10:46:14 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
10:47:10 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
Oh my! Clearly someone needs to learn his manners! Typical little boys!
Librarian 1:
10:47:30 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
This is the best chat I’ve ever had.
10:47:47 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
Librarian 1:
10:48:08 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
Nothing, I just meant that Walter was amusing.
10:48:26 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
This is very unusual. Out of all the people he can talk to ask for help, he chooses the library!
Librarian 1:
10:48:53 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
Well, we are here to help! Clearly he got the message. Unfortunately I can’t help him get his cookies back.
10:49:51 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
Well, I’m a very busy mom and I’m glad that the library does have a 24/7 chat! Do you think you can keep Walter busy for ten minutes? I need to go downstairs in the basement for the laundry.
10:50:18 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
I’m sorry if I’m asking too much. Expenses are due today and I have to do my taxes.
Librarian 1:
10:50:32 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
Unfortunately I dont’ think being on the other end of the computer screen would make me a very good sitter!
10:51:39 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
Unlike other boys, Walter doesn’t like to move around much, considering he’s a bit lazy. He likes to be on the computer all day playing games. I will leave you with Walter if that’s okay with you.
Librarian 1:
10:53:06 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
Unfortunately I have some other chats that have come in and I have to answer some reference questions. Tell Walter I said good luck getting his cookies back (though by this point, I imagine they’ve been eaten.)
Librarian 1:
10:53:09 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
Thanks for chatting.
Librarian 1:
10:53:12 2014/04/16 (GMT -0400)
Librarian ended chat session.

By Ally Malinenko

I live in Brooklyn which is good except when it’s not which is horrid. I’ve been writing for awhile, and have some stuff published and some stuff not. I don’t like when people refer to pets as their children and I can’t resist a handful of cheez-its when offered. I have a burning desire to go to Antarctica, specifically to the South Pole so I can see where Robert Falcon Scott died. I like to read books. I like to write stories and poems. I even wrote some novels. You can read them.


Leave a comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s